Letters from the Evans

I haven't posted much in the last year or so. One of the reasons for that is that I'm insanely busy, but a more ridiculous, yet true, reason is because I have a google account I have to use for teaching my classes, and Google Chrome is such a bum about letting me easily switch between accounts, and it's just a pain. I finally had an epiphany and downloaded Firefox onto my computer so I can log on with one account on each type of browser, wahla!

Here are some of my favorite Clara and Emma -isms from the past several months:

In the car on the way to gymnastics:
CB: Why do we have to do this Every. Single. Day?!
Me: Do what?
CB: Grow up!

In the car on the way home from church choir:
CB: I'm thinking about something.
Me: what?
CB: I don't know. I don't understand my thinking.

After almost 10 minutes of silence as Clara colors:
CB: Mommy, in a few whiles. A long time ago. Ummmm. I'm gonna tell you something.
Me: Okay.
CB: There is a frog and a princess somewhere.

After viewing a photo of Marissa, Lulu, Clara and Molly from a couple of years ago:
CB: “If I sit on Auntie M’s lap, it’s all crunchy and pokey for me!”

While praying over dinner on a Monday:
Emma: God, my mommy didn't take me to church today. But food is good. Amen.

At Hallmark, looking at a nativity ornament:
Clara: I wish I could have a baby Jesus. (Pause.) Oh well, I guess I still have Emma.

After listening to a song on the radio:
CB: Mommy, why is there a song about my teacher?
Me: Sorry, Clara, I don't understand what you mean.
CB (sings): The weather out side is Miss Wright-ful, but the fire is so delightful...

Every single time upon pulling onto our street/in our driveway:

We had no idea the impact letting Emma "help" us plug in the lights at Christmas time would have. For almost a solid month, every single time Emma saw the lights on at our house:
Emma: That my work! My favorite work!

On the way home from a birthday party at noon in December:
Clara informed us that she didn't like our plan for the rest of the day, so Bryan and I invited her to tell us what she would do for the rest of the day if she could choose.
CB: Emma take a nap with me in my room. Then we go slide on the swings. Then go swimming. Then go for a good walk. Then jump on the trampoline. Then have dinner. Then play. Then jump in the backyard. Then go for a long walk to get a donut.... then I guess we could go night night.
Bryan: So after we go swimming during a cold front, we will do all of these things and go to bed by 3am?
CB: Yep!
Me: Hmm. Ok. What's your plan Emma?
Emma, trying to shake her booty in the car: Get down like this, and run like daddy and go FAST over 'der.

Walking out of church into the parking lot, and looking at some kids playing with rocks:
CB: What are them doing? No, what are hers doing? No, what are theirs doing? No. What are THEY doing? Yes! Got it.... soooo guys, whatcha doin'?"

In the car:
Emma: I did it!
Me: What did you do?
Emma: I be me!

Randomly I hear from the playroom:
CB: I just gonna keep coloring.
Me: okay..
CB: don't say 'okay' mommy. I was talking to GOD, not you.

Clara tries to sing "Felize Navidad" but it comes out sounding like "Belize in your butt!"

In the car on the way to swim lessons:
Emma: *ALL THE SHOUTED RANDOM WORDS*
Clara: I have no idea what you are saying to me right now.
Emma: It's 'tuz you don't get me.

In the car on the way to school:
Clara: Angels are just so good at hide'n'seek. I can't see them. I know Jesus is hiding in the sky but I just can't get up there to tag him..... but when I opened my eyes as a baby I saw Jesus because he came down to say hi to me.

After exploring her shoulders and neck with her hands:
CB: I am gonna make a good giraffe when I grow up.

In the car:
Emma demanded to sit in the front seat as we were driving down the highway and I told her no, that it was illegal and unsafe.
CB: Yeah Emma. You gotta be 60 years old to drive a car! Like Mommy, see? She's really really reallllllly old.

Emma's turn to pray over dinner:
Emma: Thank you Jesus, friends, my food and alllllll the forks. Amen.

On the way to the movie theater:
CB: We are gonna meet Lulu and Papa at the movies?
Bryan: No, just Lulu.
CB: But Papa is FUNNY!

After the movie theater:
CB: Thank you for the movie, Mommy.
Me: You're welcome.
CB: Thank you for the movie, Daddy.
Bryan: You're welcome.
CB: Thank you for the movie, Lulu.
Bryan: Umm, well, she's not in the car, Clara.
CB: Oh I know. I just prayed to her so she would know.

After sitting silently and still on the living room rug for a little while:
CB: If you're special, the moon will follow you. If you're MORE special-er, then the sun follows you.
Bryan: Ha, that's how religions get started.
CB: Yes. Pray.

After waking up in the morning:
Clara explaining that she had a good dream all about princesses and not bad guys:
"Cinderella was sitting in a chair and getting her special slipper on. Jaz-man was letting all the birdies fly into the sky. Sleeping Beauty touched the spinning wheel but she was okay - didn't fall over or anything. Elsa built her castle and Anna sang on the swing outside. The princess with the frog made lots of soup when she was a little girl!"

Clara, while eating lunch:
CB: Soooo, if God is in my tummy, does this rice bonk him on the head?

*Sorry for this more graphic quote, but it made me laugh so hard, and I want to remember it!*

After Emma and I got out of the shower one morning:
Emma was on my lap and I was toweling her off. She's never been super interested in my body before, but all of a sudden she takes her finger and slowly touches the tip of my boob. She looked up at me, smiled so happily, and said, "I just really like your piggies, Mommy."

Recent funny conversations with Clara & Emma Lou:

Emma, determined to do something hardcore:

Emma: I gonna swim, I gonna jump, I gonna play ALL DAY.

Clara: Sure, Emma. How about you just sit instead?

Emma: Okayyyyy. I gonna sit HARD.

On the way home from school one afternoon:

Em: At school, at school, at school, I jumped! Jumped high. And, uh, and, and I jumped and hit my head like this *whack*, like this! And, and I jumped on the, uh, the cot, and jumped on the cot and hit my head and it, it HUWT!

CB: Emma, just SAY it already; did you break your head or not?! 

Em: Yep. It all broke. 

On our first homeschool day following Thanksgiving Break:

Clara: We didn't cut all Thanksgiving, so my scissors are REALLY hungry for paper.

Clara, as she tries to discover what's going on with the whole Christmas Story:

Clara: Mommy, why do the Wise Men wear dresses?

Me: Well, they wear robes. It was traditional clothes for the time.

Clara: Doesn't seem wise to forget your pants.